Thursday, June 20, 2013

Happy 1st Birthday Malakai

Today is your 1st birthday and what an amazing year it has been. You've grown a lot over the last year and keep me very busy. But I'll write another post just on how much you keep me hopping and all the mischief you get into. This post is going to be about the memories I have from the day you were born that I never wrote down (even though I've meant to for about a year now!).

The day you were born was beautiful. We checked into the hospital in Newberg, OR around 5:30am and were set up in our room. The room we had had a wonderful view. We were able to see hot air balloons rising and I couldn't help but watch them. It was so peaceful. I wasn't anxious at all about having a 3rd c-section. In fact I was just plain ready to be done with being pregnant. This was the last pregnancy for me. I was done. I was tired of all the morning sickness, the lack of energy, and the bad taste in my mouth that made me want to throw up unless I was chewing peppermint gum.

Once we were all checked in we had about an hour to wait. It felt long and short at the same time. There were some moments that the clock hardly seemed to moved but then it seemed that various nurses were suddenly coming into the room to let me know who they were and what they would be doing. You had a nurse just for you and I had a nurse just for me. I also met the anesthesiologist who would be helping me by numbing my back and legs so that I couldn't feel anything from the waist down.

Daddy changed into his operating room getup and soon after that I was wheeled away into the operating room. It was around 7:30am.

Once I was all numbed up and ready to go they brought daddy into the operating room. I was ready so to meet you!

Finally, the doctor said I'd feel a slight tug (which I was aware of from when your sisters were born) and then I heard you crying. I couldn't see you but I could hear you. I just kept waiting and it seemed to take awhile before they had you all cleaned off and I could actually see you. Daddy was standing near you taking pictures as the nurses cleaned you off and checked your vitals.

Eventually, the nurse brought you over and I got to see you briefly before they took you and daddy back to our room. I stayed in the operating room as they closed me up.

I was quite anxious to hold you, but I knew it wouldn't be too long before the doctor was finished and I was wheeled back to the room where you were. The anesthesiologist asked me how I was doing and I was doing okay. I was starting to feel a little cold but that was it. He said if I started feel queasy to let him know but I was doing okay.

They doctor finished up and it was time for them to wheel me back to our room. Right as they started moving the bed I began to feel queasy. I closed my eyes and hoped the feeling would go away but it didn't. We got into the room and I managed to tell the nurse (or whoever was in there) that I wasn't feeling well. And then I started throwing up. For the next 3 hours if I moved my head or tried to sit up I would get a huge wave of nausea and I would start throwing up. Eventually, I had nothing to throw up since I hadn't eaten since the night before. The anesthesiologist came in several times to check on me and kept changing my medication to get the nausea under control. My nurse stayed in the room with me the entire time.

During this time, you slept peacefully in the hospital bassinet and daddy sat nearby. I'm quite thankful you slept for those 3 hours because if you had been crying I think I would have been even more stressed out. I kept watching the clock and thinking that I just wanted to hold you. The hours ticked by and I was not feeling better. I was starting to get frustrated with myself and was trying to will myself to stop throwing up. You were my last baby and I just wanted to hold you! Part of me could not believe this was happening. The anesthesiologist seemed a little surprised too and mentioned he thought that maybe them wheeling me backwards from the operating room to our room had played a part in my queasiness, but who knows why it happened.

Mentally, I gave myself a cut-off time of 11am to feel better. I remember thinking that I HAD to feel better by 11am. I'm pretty sure I wasn't thinking all that clearly but I desperately wanted to be better by then so that I could nurse you and hold you before your sisters (Sanaa and Layla) came to meet you with grandpa and grandma Lind. I also didn't want Sanaa and Layla to see me sick. I knew Sanaa would worry since she was already a little anxious about me being in the hospital.

Finally, the anesthesiologist suggested placing a patch behind my ear. The medication they had been trying wasn't working and the patch was a final attempt to get my nausea under control. It worked! I was starting to feel better. I could sit up and move my head without getting sick.

I don't remember exactly what time it was but it was sometime after 11am that I got to hold you for the first time. It was at least 3 hours after you were born and I was so happy I could finally hold you.

Not long after I held you, grandpa and grandma Lind showed up with your sisters and they got to meet you for the first time. Both Sanaa and Layla loved you from the time they met you.

However, Sanaa was also concerned about me being in a bed at the hospital. I still wasn't feeling the best when they arrived to meet you but I wasn't about to let Sanaa know how bad I felt. She seemed to be most concerned about me being in the hospital and I didn't want her to worry or be scared.

Here's a picture of you with Sanaa and Layla a few days after you were home.

And now you don't stay still for pictures so it's hard to get a picture of all three of you kiddos together.

Happy Birthday little guy! You are such a blessing to our family! We are so thankful and grateful you are a part of our family now.

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